Trauma anniversaries can be a result of private (e.g. sexual assault, domestic violence or childhood abuse) or public trauma (e.g. natural disasters, terrorist attacks or political violence). Whether private or public, trauma anniversaries can stir up intense emotions and symptoms. These reactions are normal, and they are known as anniversary reactions.
Why do trauma anniversaries occur?
Trauma affects both our minds and bodies. When a traumatic event occurs, our body activates its fight, flight, or freeze response to protect us from the overwhelming danger. When this trauma is not fully processed, this survival response becomes overactive. Resultingly, cues that remind us of the traumatic event can trigger this intense reaction, even when there is no real threat.
As the trauma anniversary nears, we may feel more on edge as our body reacts to perceived threats. These cues can be internal, such as emotional or physical states (i.e. feeling the same emotions or bodily sensations felt during the trauma). Cues can also be external, such as time-based (i.e. seasonal changes, time of year) or environmental triggers (i.e. sights, sounds, smells). Encountering a cue can activate the body’s survival response and can leave you feeling anxious, nervous or scared.
However, these trauma reminders are not always negative. In some cases, they can support the healing process. For example, the anniversary of a loss may bring memories of a loved one and offer space to process your grief more deeply. Media coverage of a public tragedy can also rally survivors together and facilitate community support.
Trauma Anniversary Symptoms
Trauma anniversaries can often make PTSD symptoms worse. You may experience feelings of self-judgement and question “Why am I still bothered by this?”. Or you may face anticipation anxiety, dreading the day for fear you will struggle.
Other common symptoms include:
Reliving the event
Most common symptom
Re-experiencing the feelings, bodily responses and thoughts that occurred during the trauma
Avoidance
Avoidance of anything related to the traumatic event (i.e. people, places, objects)
Negative changes in beliefs and feelings
Old thoughts or feelings of guilt or shame may return
Daily mood affected (e.g. sad, anxious, nervous)
Affects how they relate to others (i.e. friends and family)
Feeling “on edge” (hyperarousal)
Constantly feeling jittery, nervous or worried
Difficulties sleeping or having nightmares
More reactive to small triggers (i.e. irritable, easy to anger)
In children, trauma anniversary symptoms may look different and often depends on their age, developmental level and previous experience dealing with trauma. Children commonly express their trauma through aggression, agitation, withdrawal, or increased anxiousness.
Here is a summary of symptoms observed in children from different age groups:
Young Children (0-6 years old):
Regression (e.g. bedwetting, thumb-sucking, baby talk)
Separation anxiety (clinginess, fear of being alone)
Tantrums or irritability
Play that reenacts the trauma
Sleep problems (nightmares, fear of sleeping alone)
Physical complaints (stomachaches, headaches)
School-aged children (6-12 years old):
Trouble focusing or learning in school
Acting out (aggression, defiance) or withdrawing
Frequent worries or excessive guilt
Avoiding reminders of the trauma
Sadness, anger, or mood swings
Hypervigilance (always “on edge”)
Adolescents (13-18 years old):
Risk-taking behavior (substance use, reckless actions)
Social withdrawal or isolation
Emotional numbness (e.g. shutting down)
Self-harm or thoughts of suicide
Academic decline
Strong reactions to reminders (e.g. panic, anger, shutting down)
How can we feel better?
Over time, the distress will become less frequent and less intense. Most people start to feel better within a week or two after the anniversary of the traumatic event. While symptoms can feel overwhelming, there are effective strategies to help you cope.
1. Caring for Your Physical Health
Your physical health pays a big role in your mental well-being. A balanced diet, regular exercise and sufficient rest is especially important when dealing with trauma anniversaries, as they help regulate emotions and build emotional resilience.
Exercise releases endorphins, commonly known as “happy hormones” that reduce anxiety and boost our mood. What you eat can significantly impact your mood. So, eating nutrient-rich foods can ensure your energy levels are stable and improve your feelings of anxiety, fatigue or irritability. Lastly, rest is crucial in facilitating recovery from trauma. Sleep helps restore your brain function, regulates your moods and calms your nervous system. Rest is not a luxury; it’s a necessity when coping with anniversary trauma.
2. Lean on your loved ones
When facing something as heavy as trauma, it is important to surround yourself with people who make you feel safe, seen and supported. Surround yourself with people who respect your boundaries, listen without judgement and show genuine concern. Remember, you are not alone! When trauma anniversary symptoms surface, reach out to someone you trust to get support.
3. Journalling
Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a powerful way to reduce your anniversary trauma symptoms. Writing it down can help you acknowledge and process all the complex emotions you may be feeling. It can express emotions or thoughts that are too hard to say out loud, providing an outlet to reduce emotional overwhelm and facilitate healing.
4. Try Calming Exercises
Heart pounding, hands shaking and thoughts racing – when our survival response takes over, it can be difficult to steady ourselves admists the overwhelming emotions. Mindfulness exercises can help bring awareness to our emotions, calm our nervous system, and reground us to the present.
5. Seek Professional Help
Trauma is not something to dismiss or minimise. When left unaddressed, it can become deeply rooted and lead to serious mental health challenges such as depression, anxiety and emotional dysregulation. Sometimes, self-care alone is not enough – and that is okay! There is no shame in asking for help. Just like how you would visit a doctor when your body’s not feeling well, it can be helpful to visit a mental health professional if you have been struggling with your mental health. Therapists, counsellors and psychologists are trained to create a safe space where you feel supported, understood and heard. Asking for help is the bravest thing you can do for yourself.
What about helping your child?
Guiding children through trauma, especially anniversary trauma, requires understanding, patience and emotional sensitivity. Here are some ways you can support them:
1. Prepare and Acknowledge
Gently prepare your child for the anniversary using age-appropriate language to help them understand the emotions they may experience. In the days leading up to it, practicing simple calming strategies together can equip them with healthy ways to manage their feelings.
2. Let Them Lead
Children process trauma in different ways. Some may want to face it head-on, while others prefer to avoid the anniversary altogether. Whichever approach, it is important not push our advice onto them and instead follow their cues. Give them space to cope with the trauma in the way that feels safest to them.
3. Create a Safe Environment for your Child
When a child experiences trauma, it can be difficult for them to feel safe again. As a parent or caregiver, it is important to consistently create a safe space where they feel comfortable and enough to share their feelings. Only when we know what they are feeling, can we tackle the complex emotions with them.
Anniversary trauma and the distressing feelings, thoughts and physical symptoms it brings can be incredibly difficult to face. Navigating trauma can sometimes feel like an endless dark tunnel. But take heart – healing is possible. Lean on those who love you and be patient with yourself.
Healing is never linear but every small step forward makes all the difference to recovery.